There are many reasons people might fake an orgasm. You might be tired, nervous, or, unfortunately, bored. You might do it to protect a partner’s feelings. However, no matter your reasoning, it’s not a healthy habit to indulge in. There are many risks and drawbacks to faking it, both personally and for your relationship.
Your partner won't learn how to please you
Faking an orgasm doesn’t do anyone any favors. While you might think that you’re sparking your partner’s ego and protecting their feelings, you’re actually depriving them of knowing how to please you sexually. When you fake an orgasm, you’re telling your partner that what they’re doing feels good, when it reality it probably doesn’t. Your partner isn’t a mind reader. There’s no way that they will be able to figure out how to really turn you on and get you off if you’re pretending that they already are. This doesn’t help you build a better sex life or foster intimacy with your partner. You’re also hurt your sex life. If your partner doesn’t know that you’re not orgasming, then there’s no way that you can explore each other freely and without limitations. You’re putting up roadblocks to a better sex life not only for yourself, but for your partner, as well.
It hurts your bond and intimacy with your partner
Our sex lives are an important part of our relationship with our partner. It’s where we connect with them on a more physical and primal level than any other. When you fake your orgasms, you’re shortchanging both you and your partner of connection. You miss out on a fulfilling sex life and learning how your partner can pleasure you. You also miss out on a deeper connection and intimacy. You won’t ever feel the full sexual, raw, emotional connection with your partner that an orgasm gives you. Faking an orgasm will keep you at arm’s length from your partner emotionally.
Faking it takes a toll on your self-esteem
When you fake an orgasm, it’s rarely about your partner. Most often, people fake an orgasm to protect a partner’s feelings, but sometimes it is also about convenience. You might feel like it takes too long for you to orgasm sometimes, especially with a new partner. You’re only shortchanging yourself by faking it.
Your partner will never know that it takes X to do the trick and you’ll never be able to get there. Instead, you’ll be stuck missing out on more orgasms and building up your partner’s ego. Every time you fake it, you hold yourself back.
Faking an orgasm can make you feel like you’re lying to your partner
This breach of trust can ruin the trust in your relationship and even effect the trust you have in other relationships outside your romantic one.
Faking it could be harmful to your mental health
If you’re constantly not getting what you need, faking orgasms, and living without a fulfilling sex life, it can take a toll on your mental health. Living without orgasms, without a connection with your partner, and living a life where you don’t have the fulfilling sex life is painful. It can make people feel empty, lonely, or even just sad.
Not having an orgasm has been proven to make someone feel depressed or lonely, as once you have an orgasm, your brain releases endorphins, which reduce pain, lift your mood, and lower stress.
Faking orgasms isn’t just bad for your relationship; it’s also not benefiting you.
Faking orgasms doesn’t help you, your partner, or your relationship. It’s time to start focusing on building a better, more honest, sex life. Eventually, it will happen and the frustration you may feel now will be replaced with deep fulfillment